Dear Writing Gods

So, Writing Gods, I'm still here. Just in case you'd forgotten. I mean, I'm sure you hadn't, because you're the all-seeing, all-knowing Writing Gods, but maybe you got a bit distracted by a brilliant, funny writer or a writer who wears way cooler clothes than I do or maybe a writer who actually spends more time at their desk than baking. And I'd understand that, really I would. But I haven't given up. I'm still here in my ugg boots with my copy of 'How Not to Suck at Writing' and I'm still making up stories and sending them away. But it's been quiet. Eerie. Here's something I wonder - do you ever think the acceptances and awards we writers get could be spaced out a little better? As Writing Gods, do you ever consider using your influence to drip-feed our successes throughout the year? Why must we get all our good news close together, then nothing for months? Writing Gods, it's cruel. So anyway, if you're not too busy, maybe fling something my way? Anything would be fine. A longlist, an honourable mention. Hell, I'd take a personal rejection note at this point. Just a sign from above not to open a bakery. Also, Writing Gods, sorry for whining. I appreciate the thrills of the Writing Life, I really do. I know I'm so fortunate. I thank you for your bounty and I grovel humbly before you. Yours in readiness,Fiona